Tuesday, January 10, 2012

I'm just venting.

I just wanted to take a bit of time to vent...  I have two lovely kids-- they are smart and sweet.
And honestly most of the time~ I am so very proud of them.

However-- my son has been having a challenging time recently.
I have thought about giving the kid water and bread for a week... just to get him back to behaving.

He's not being violent -- but he is not listening the first time, and he requests extra time to manage his behaviors. However,  he is unwilling to be patient with others.

I feel like I'm being parented by my child. grrrrr.   Since he has SPD and I know how bad the meltdowns are-- I am reluctant to "batten down the hatches"...  I realize that this may just be a short lived stage, maybe he's growing-- maybe he's getting sick. But, whatever the reason-- His behavior needs to CHANGE.
He's too smart for his own good.
On one side of the scale is the attempt to see his SPD as a part of his life.
On the other side of the scale is the knowledge that he needs boundaries and structure.

When he is misbehaving he won't listen,~~~ then when the obnoxiousness is over he has an "excuse" about why he acted the way he did.   I'm SO tired of the excuses.   

And then I also know that if I crack down too much on Shane-- he gets super depressed about his lot in life. This way of thinking scares me-- I don't know how much of the negative stuff he means-- or is he just saying the negative stuff to get a pass on being responsible, respectful and considerate. 

I guess it's time to break open those parenting books and see if I missed some chapters!


HennHouse said...

Sometimes you have to vent and talk through the options so see what they all are. Here for you, Stacey.

Anonymous said...

Oh my this sounds wayyyyy familiar Stace! He knows just what gets to mom....! He knows mom has empathy. It's okay if he seems to be depressed as long as it is not "real depression" Stace. The negative stuff is for your benefit mom. He is getting smarter about it all and he will keep changing. Remember when I said just as you get it figured out they throw you something new. Well now you have to stand your ground mom and not let him see that your are so sympathetic unless he truly needs a hug and is truly feeling bad. Time to separate your emotions from his as much as possible and try to adjust and be consistent as much as possible. Don't let him work you mom. He thinks that if he explains why then you will be sympathetic but it's time to let him know that excuses do not matter and that any discussions about the situation need to wait until later after any consequences have taken place. I love you Stace. Time to readjust...again... mom! It is always a challenge but you can do it. Let me know if you need to talk.....! Me

Barbara @ TherExtras said...

Can't get any better adviser than HennHouse! Take her up on an offer!